Cell-fish-ness Assignment#10

It is “the distracting glow in a movie theatre…, the narcissistic multi-taskers holding up lineups [and the]…dinner companions obsessively checking messages” that is creating an epidemic of rudeness when referring to cell phones. The article "Public display of disaffection" by Anne Kingston and Alex Ballingall addresses the "cell-fish-ness" of using a cell phone in inappropriate public scenarios. The cell phone is referred to as "an addiction" and a distraction that many people are intolerant to and find disrespectful. The article illustrates how "we’re losing our one-on-one people skills".  It is also stated that texting at a public event is viewed as unprofessional and “rude period”.  “People are preoccupied [and] oblivious to “their anti-social behaviour” and the issue is only growing worse.

The idea of a cellphone is paradoxical, "it connects virtual communities and irritates the person standing next to you". The article “Public display of disaffection” by Anne Kingston and Alex Ballingall illustrates just how consequential cell phones can be. The authors of this article are indubitably correct. When graduates are "typing away on mobile devices themselves”, amid their own graduation, there is a predicament." People are so preoccupied they're oblivious” to how much of a nuisance their being and how they are risking their valued relationships.  Cellphones promote and “invite antisocial behaviour" and numerous people are fed up with being ignored. It is time for our society to push the boundaries, "ensuring the ringers are off, it’s a start".  

                      Silence

                                Of

                                   The

                                        Night

Megan Collier

December. 9.2011

They do not speak,

                              Dark peculiar figures materialize.

Evasive,

           They hold a vague secret,

        Concealed beneath their opaque coats.

They glare down at me as if I am a convict on lockdown,

And recoil as I close in.

They do not speak,

         Terror appears in their eyes.

I have breached their shield.

And they flee from the scene,

                     As if they have committed a heinous crime.

They do not speak,

                         They can not hear.

                                          They have disappeared,

         Gone,

Into the black veil,

              That is the night.

           They do not speak,

Because they are not here.

I am deserted.

       I feel forlorn,

                           Perplexed,   

                                         Daunted.

Leaving my prior knowledge,

                                             Scattered,     

                                                           

                                                            I walk away.

“No human relationship is friction-free.” The poem “puce fairy book” by Alice Major discusses the unfair stereotypes of a perfect fairytale woman. Similarly in the passage “Forget Prince Charming” by June Callwood a grandmother offers realistic advice to her granddaughters on the imperfection of relationships. Alice Major would agree with the honesty and realism of the grandmother’s advice.

A happily ever after is not filled with practicality. Alice Major expresses her doubt in perfect fairytale like relationships in the poem “puce fairy book.” She does not implore the thought of “Rapunzel waiting in a tower”. No woman has hair with such length or a mind with such patience. Bringing a woman a crystal slipper is “slightly passé.” The situation could result in injured egos, as a foot is tried to squeeze into a shoe, much too quaint for such a large foot. One can never confidently retain such information as a shoe size. She understands that a man expects and yearns for a “lady sleeping a garden… never been kissed” but the assumption is historic. Alice Major is equitable in deeming fairytales to be conceited and immature.

The “perfect mate [does not] exist”. June Callwood depicts the story of a grandmother prompting her granddaughters to not believe in the “freak of nature” that is a fairy tale relationship. In the poem "Forget Prince Charming" it made clear that partners are not always on the same page. The speaker advises her grandchildren  on how to find the right man to share their love and their lives with. She concludes that all relationships have their problems but it is only the sturdy relationships filled with compromise and some laughs that last an eternity. The grandmother is totally justified in her opinion on the daily battles of a committed relationship. 

Alice Major the speaker of “puce fairy book” would agree, generally speaking, with the grandmother in “Forget Prince Charming” and her admonition to her grandchildren in finding a suitable mate. The grandmother had been “saying since they were small ..that a successful mating has little to do with finding prince charming.” Alike to the grandmother’s statement Alice with “mature consideration [declines]… the honor of cutting of [her] toe” because she is aware that no prince charming is worth struggling to fit into a crystal slipper. Both Alice and the grandmother agree that the “totality [of a relationship] has to feel fair to both.” The couple would be unable to survive a long term relation without the “mutual ability to compromise.” Both speakers are justified are in their educated beliefs of being shamelessly cheated by men daily. 

The River- Garth Brooks

You know a dream is like a river
Ever changin' as it flows
And a dreamer's just a vessel
That must follow where it goes
Trying to learn from what's behind you
And never knowing what's in store
Makes each day a constant battle
Just to stay between the shores...and

I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I'll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry

Too many times we stand aside
And let the waters slip away
'Til what we put off 'til tomorrow
Has now become today
So don't you sit upon the shoreline
And say you're satisfied
Choose to chance the rapids
And dare to dance the tide...yes

I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I'll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry

There's bound to be rough waters
And I know I'll take some falls
But with the good Lord as my captain
I can make it through them all...yes

I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I'll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry

Yes, I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry
'Til the river runs dry

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Some may say that poetry hard. Hard to write, hard to read and hard to interpret. Nevertheless poetry can be as simple as a country song. "The River" by Garth Brooks mirrors poetry using a conglomeration of techniques. This song depicts a dream being a river and the dreamer being the boat traveling across its waterway. Primarily it is stated that "a dream is like a river" symbolizing the constant change that occurs daily. As a simile it is articulated that a  "dreamer is like a vessel" depicting how one is unable to control a dream and how you " must follow where it goes ".  Expressing a hyperbole he states that  "each day is a constant battle". He confronts hardships with the same favorable attitude "till the river runs dry" .Using an analogy a comparison is made between "a bird upon the wind" and the waters being his sky. Making an allusion to God he declares that he will sail with "the good Lord as [his] captain. He believes that god is gazing down on him advocating for the most harmonious journey. Through repetition it is concluded that he will sail his vessel "till the river runs dry", never giving in to discomfort or distress. Garth's innovative lyrics and prolific imagery create a song of both easy listening and clever poetry. Each day a dab of poetry can be detected as it is concealed everywhere.

Assignment#6

An old women 

A daunting, aged face fell into my gaze. Her head blanketed with a scarf , wrapped tightly,attempting to hide the poorly kept secret of her many years. Withering eyes glared down at me, creating a feeling of unease, but I could not help staring. This piercing scowl was too intriguing. The creases spanned out across her forehead, like unfortunate cracks through a poorly constructed piece of pottery. Her dark eyes still intensely scrutinizing mine,  brimming with the wisdom of her copious years. Heavy circles fell beneath her eyes, as ample proof of how decrepit she had become. Further conveying the longevity of her life, a voluminous nose jutted from her seasoned face. Her cheeks sagged, like heavy curtains gripping to their rod, and lips curled greedily around a fresh cigarette. Her feeble and frail figure had undoubtedly spent long, tiresome years undertaking grueling labor. She slowly rose from her chair and weakly shuffled towards me.  This exhausted, old women held some quintessential key.  Unfathomably she knew some inevitable detail of my future.

College Application. Parallel structure

   High school is only my day job. A challenge to most, yet it does not even awaken me.  I draw sinusoidal graphs in my slumbers and recite the periodic table from memory. High school is solely a dull burden I must bear to be triumphant in my subsequent ventures. Immune from the ease of class as dusk falls, I constantly achieve greatness.


 I  have saved the world before breakfast. Settled the debt predicament in Greece before lunch and scaled a wall to ensure I would be home before dinner. I  have slept on a pillow top bed, with my eyes open.

   I traveled to Japan last week, I now speak fluent Japanese. Amid the plane trip home, our plane was hijacked. Not only did I disarm the hijackers but I also landed the plane safely. Grand theft auto was my only previous piloting experience. I was thanked by the airline. I was thanked by the passengers. Additionally I was thanked profusely by Steven Harper himself. He referred to me as a savior of man kind.

  The Queen and I enjoy tea together weekly. I attend church weekly on  Sundays. I run marathons biweekly, and am currently training to make it a weekly challenge. I participate in weekly spelling bee's. The shimmering gold medal comes home with me after each competition. I steep tea to perfection in cold water.

  I taught Picasso how to paint. I showed Steven Hawking how to publish an inimitable book. My little brother learned how to multiply fractions at the age of two. I suppose you can say I am a good teacher.

 A blind child in Africa now reads with ease, after a visit from me. I cook turkey in thirty minutes. In two minutes I consume a box of Oreo cookies. I wash down the cookies with an entire litre of milk, drunken in one minute.

  Last year I wrestled a gorilla. I emerged victorious.  Last week I held an anaconda. Although it was pitiful in comparison to the one I created for the motion picture.  Last night I baked a delectable cake. Duff Goldman constantly pleads for my recipes, he refers to me as the "Ace of Cakes".

My existence has been a mere effortless trial, only analyzing my ample skills for a more bold, demanding future. A future that I can only acquire as a university graduate.

Assignment #4

     "We never talk anymore," Jennifer sighed, as she glared at Hugh.

     Hugh moaned, "That's not true," his eyes remained fastened on the newspaper amid his hands. This was not the first time Jennifer had attacked him with this statement.

     "Your nose is always stuck in that newspaper," she exclaimed, " it's like I'm not intriguing you anymore!" Hugh abandon the newspaper and stared deeply into his wife's eyes, rage building inside him.

     "Am I not allowed to know what transpires in the world surrounding me? Is being educated a crime now?" The pair, both, becoming more agitated as each moment was passing.

    Jennifer groaned, "That's not what I was saying Hugh. Stop twisting my words."

    "You can't control me at every instant," Hugh yelled, " I'm not your puppet!"  This constant conflict angered him more each time it arouse.

     "I didn't say you were my puppet! I only wanted to engage in a little friendly conversation without a brawl."  Tears began to fill her somber eyes. Hugh could feel himself softening. He detested watching her cry.

     "I'm sorry Jennifer," Hugh spoke softly, " I love you and I hate to hurt you."
   
     "I don't enjoy it when we fight, I just want to talk the way we used to," Jennifer replied. Her eyes had begun to dry. Hugh was filled with the desire to conclude this hideous argument.
    
     Hugh pleaded, "I promise to try and focus more on you from now on. Now can we please stop quarreling?"  An eager smile grew on Jennifer's face.

     "Definitely, " she agreed grinning. "I have no desire to fuss over a newspaper ever again," she added.
    
     Hugh pronounced, "I concur!" The couple smiled, both yearning for life to always be filled with such bliss.

Assignment#3 Cliches

Alls fair in love and war

Megan Collier

Spetember, 30, 2011

George was alone in the stable when Curley's wife appeared in the doorway. Their eyes locked...
George could not help but think, she is bad to the bone. Although deep down he knew there was no use beating around the bush, she was the bee’s knees. She took a step towards him saying, “I’m bored to tears, if you catch my drift. " George forced himself appear in a manner of business as usual, he was aware her husband was the big cheese. "You caught me off guard," he began, “although I'd love to stay and chew the fat, I'd best be on my way." He had not wanted to give her the cold shoulder. However he also had not wanted to cross the line. "Wait....don't make a fuss, can't we talk?" she asked looking hurt as if he had dealt a fatal blow. For crying out loud George didn't stand a chance. He stared into her eyes and sighed, “I thought you were beautiful from day one." Red flooded into her cheeks and she looked away. Suddenly she exclaimed, "well it took you forever and a day to say, did you have a frog in your throat?" She grinned with a glimmer of hope in her exquisite brown eyes. George could feel a enormous smile stretch across his face as he told her, “believe me, I've been going bananas." Each of them stared in silence, knowing it had been love at first sight. "Well a good man is hard to find," Curley's wife stated, "and Curley isn't that good man." George thought of Curley as the green eyed monster of their love story. "All my life I've had to grin and bear it, but no more. You get Lennie and I'll get Curley's money stash." George’s excitement was now growing; finally he was living his dream. Together George, Lennie and George's wife would live and they would all be happy as clams.

Assignment#9 Moral Dilemma

Megan Collier
174 Columbia St
Victoria, BC
B3S 8G3

March 21, 2011

John Trump
Mayor
Victoria, BC

Dear Sir;


To begin, I would like to express my gratitude for requesting my assistance with this manner.  After reading your letter I began to peruse the idea of putting the elderly man, Gunter Grass in jail. I am fully aware of the crimes this man has committed in the past, although I can not repress the feeling that incarcerating this man would be a mistake.

  Gunter Grass is ninety two. Albeit I am reluctant to construe such thoughts, however the man will surely decease shortly. Even if he is healthy, it will not be long until he becomes feeble and weak. He is a seasoned man. Gunter has three children and many grandchildren, it is my belief that his meager remaining time should be shared with his family. Taking away his little time left would not just be punishing him, but his family would also suffer severely.

  Undoubtedly Gunter has provided the village with a significant chunk of his time. Serving as mayor is not an effortless task. For many years he carried out this laborious duty.  Thirty six years to be more explicit. Additionally, Gunter constructed a factory, where many of the villages inhabitants work. I have also been informed that each employee is paid well.

  Not only is Gunter providing the people of the village with his time, but also his hard earned money. This man's giving never ceases. Many charities have benefited from his wealth. There are several families throughout the village that certainly can not afford all of their expenses. Gunter gives them enough money to settle their bills.

  This man appears to be saint like from every aspect. However I am aware that he has committed numerous wrong doings long ago. While I am not conveying that these were reputable acts, there are reasons to suppose that perhaps he was forced to complete such hideous acts. One is never able to be certain. I would like to assume that the treacherous murders he oversaw, were demanded of him by Hitler himself.

  I presume that this letter was of some assistance, and I bid you good luck with you decision.

Sincerely,


Megan Collier

Assignment #1

Dress Stress

Megan Collier

Sept.11.11

   Chiffon, taffeta or charmeuse?  Three fabrics I have never heard of before. All hanging before me fashioned into long elegant prom dresses. Bateau, cowl or keyhole? The list of necklines never ends. One even titled a "crumb-catcher" extending out in every direction like a peacock.  The associates of these boutiques all stare at me as though I should possess these answers. They can not comprehend the lack of knowledge that I have in this area. I scrutinize every detail of each dress, becoming more drained after everyone. I know that none are "the one".

   My feet have become more cumbersome after each store, now dragging in exhaustion. I need a breather. I yearn to sit somewhere without sequin in sight. I try to fabricate the image of the dress I will wear. I can not do it. I try to distinguish what I despise from what I adore. I begin to build the list.

  It has to be anything but ordinary. It has to exclaim Megan from every angle. It can not be a tea length or high calf, it must brush the floor. I want a dress void of sleeves and heavy beading.

  This dress shopping is not for the faint of heart. My head is brimming with ideas. This task I once dreaded, I now hold some excitement for. I briskly walk down the bustling street. As I see an intriguing store I begin shimmying between the executives hurrying home from a day of work. I freeze speechless; staring at a storefront, knowing the hunt is over. Encased in a glass cage in front of me is an exquisite gown screaming my name.  I can breathe once more, as I gaze at the dress I will wear to my prom.

 The next task...shoes.